mormondad:

i completely forgot that you actually have to pay for internet

(via gnarly)

Anonymous:
What do you call a lesbian with long nails?

thatonebl0nde:

Single

these gender rolls taste disgusting

(Source: matissegal, via j0ye)

"What if women had minstrel cycles instead of menstrual cycles? You’d just have a guy with a lute follow you around for a week every month and play you songs constantly?"

My boyfriend (via thecarrionlibrarian)

#no but can you imagine if that was how you learned once a month you weren’t pregnant#by some dude singing songs about the victory of it#you wake up and he’s there and you are so happy#this dude becomes your favorite dude#but then you realize you haven’t seen your friend’s minstrel in a while#I mean everyone notices#like half the people are on the same cycle so for one week out of four your job is just flooded with fucking minstrels everywhere#the cacophony#but Mary over there is all alone#and she’s like my minstrel is late#but we all fucking know#her minstrel has gone off to find her a baby#a nine month journey he must make alone#and until he comes back there is no music in her life#what a glorious world this would be#I love the minstrels (@onionjuggler)

(via faygo-fuckyourself)

katkinkat:

*forgets to talk to friends for 4 weeks*

(Source: baebees, via guy)

"I wish my shadow would get up and walk beside me."

Jandy Nelson, The Sky is Everywhere (via quoted-books)

(via bookmad)

(Source: tylerjeromeh, via dutchster)

its-a-joke-mkay:

fidefortitude:

crofefs:

i love how there is no comments on this everyone just gets the reference

No. No, I don’t get the reference. 300 thousand people have reblogged this without a word, without so much as a tag, because apparently we all get the reference. I fucking don’t. This has passed by my dashboard hundreds of fucking times and nobody ever asks what the fuck it is.

I’m officially terming this post a conspiracy. 300000 people could not just know what this is. You’re all reblogging this to fit in, or because you know it messes with people, or because you’re the fucking Matrix. You’re the Matrix, aren’t you? You’re all a bunch of Mr Smiths living in a world of green code. Well fuck you all and fuck your stupid post. I’m off to save fucking Zion.

Fuck this.

Dude it’s from spongebob

(Source: lordheck, via guy)

Timestamp: 1411185910

its-a-joke-mkay:

fidefortitude:

crofefs:

i love how there is no comments on this everyone just gets the reference

No. No, I don’t get the reference. 300 thousand people have reblogged this without a word, without so much as a tag, because apparently we all get the reference. I fucking don’t. This has passed by my dashboard hundreds of fucking times and nobody ever asks what the fuck it is.

I’m officially terming this post a conspiracy. 300000 people could not just know what this is. You’re all reblogging this to fit in, or because you know it messes with people, or because you’re the fucking Matrix. You’re the Matrix, aren’t you? You’re all a bunch of Mr Smiths living in a world of green code. Well fuck you all and fuck your stupid post. I’m off to save fucking Zion.

Fuck this.

Dude it’s from spongebob

(Source: lordheck, via guy)

paintdeath:

full time hoe online….very shy hoe irl

(via hotboyproblems)

Going back to school in September

jayma-jones:

Teacher - did you do anything nice during Summer?

Me - oh yeah, I went to L.A, New York, Miami and did a bunch of photoshootsimage

(via gnarly)