laughcentre:

don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes

(Source: allantruong, via pizza)

heislikefireburningthroughtime:

my mum just told me to “stop being so depressed all the time”

image

(Source: wiiiinchester, via joshpeck)

gipsiidanger:

aviculor:

westbor0baptistchurch:

I Was Trying To Be Funny But It Came Out as Really Mean: A 5-part documentary starring me.

I Was Trying To Be Loving And Supportive But I Probably Overstepped My Boundaries And Came Off as Creepy: a feature-length film with two sequels and a TV series adaption.

I Was Trying To Tell You I Relate To Your Difficult Situation But It Probably Sounded Like I Was Making It All About Me: a novel saga with several side book adaptions and a movie.

(via no-perks-in-being-a-pessimimist)

fivesecondsofonedirection24:

chelle-the-zbornak-queen:

nowacking:

Good Guy Burglar

no you don’t understand.

he fully knew that he’d be arrested for breaking and entering but he still reported this.

he know he’d go to jail, but he put human decency before his own freedom and called out this disgusting sexual perversion.

and if you don’t think that’s the tightest shit ever get out of my face.

@

(Source: thedeathmerchant, via no-perks-in-being-a-pessimimist)

Timestamp: 1396615506

fivesecondsofonedirection24:

chelle-the-zbornak-queen:

nowacking:

Good Guy Burglar

no you don’t understand.

he fully knew that he’d be arrested for breaking and entering but he still reported this.

he know he’d go to jail, but he put human decency before his own freedom and called out this disgusting sexual perversion.

and if you don’t think that’s the tightest shit ever get out of my face.

@

(Source: thedeathmerchant, via no-perks-in-being-a-pessimimist)

autumnraining:

CAN WE TAKE A SECOND TO APPRECIATE AN ACTUAL LINE FROM A FALL OUT BOY SONG:

“Anything you say can and will be held against you so only say my name”

IF YOU DON’T THINK THAT’S SMOOTH AS FUCK YOU CAN GET OUT OF MY FACE CAUSE THAT’S A SWEET-ASS PICKUP LINE

(via no-perks-in-being-a-pessimimist)

misterchekov:

reblog if your dick is longer than your arm

(Source: akailolita, via adultnapped)

roundworms:

how do i politely ask him to slam me against a wall and make out with me

(Source: paarasytes, via no-perks-in-being-a-pessimimist)

starcecilia:

untilthesunburnsout:

fuk off jan

I love him.

(Source: spacedmaggs, via adultnapped)

Timestamp: 1396614947

starcecilia:

untilthesunburnsout:

fuk off jan

I love him.

(Source: spacedmaggs, via adultnapped)